want a moment to be real [CLOSED]

[identitycrisiscore]

Who ⬤ Cloud Strife and various
What ⬤ Misc. Thread catch-all for July!
When ⬤ All throughout the month
Where ⬤ Sutoku Territory, primarily.
Content Warnings ⬤ One of these threads has Sephiroth, so all the messy things that come with his obsession with Cloud. Update: The Sephiroth thread also includes spoilers for the original FF7.


[ If you'd like a closed starter, let me know on Discord or on my Plurk at svensational

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[identitycrisiscore]

[ As Sephiroth moves, so does Cloud, moving to the space Sephiroth vacates. It's instinctual, the two now pacing around each other. Cloud's heart hammering in his chest. He can feel his hands shaking more, unable to quell the shakes — not just from anger, but the tremors in his hands, lingering symptoms of how close Cloud came to death at Kaigo no Bou. ]

[ Even through the haze of panic clouding his judgment, Cloud can tell Sephiroth wants an answer to this question. He wants to hear Cloud say it with his own lips. If that's her fate, he would do anything to change it. But if he says it... he can't take it back. It'll be something Sephiroth holds against him for the rest of their time in hell. ]

[ There was a beat, before he forced the issue, though. Sephiroth took great glee in knowing the best ways to pressure Cloud. To that end, the man didn't give him a moment to breathe, unless it was to draw out the agonizing answer. ]

[ If he backs off, he loses this chance. There is something here. He isn't just imagining it. ]

You aren't answering mine, either. [ His throat sounds dry, and he practically exhales the words in a shaky breath. There's a fear welling up as he presses the issue. A bone-deep familar fear, visions of Nibelheim in the back of his mind. ]

This is what you meant when the plate fell. [ No, he has to take it a step further. ]

...Or do you not remember?

[ Cloud will explore every avenue he can before he admits the truth to Sephiroth. It'd be as good as letting the man take up residence in his head even more than he already had. ]

[sefirot]

[There's something amusing in the way Cloud moves as he does. Almost mirroring each other just so he can keep his distance. Is it fear or something else? Hard to tell these days.

He pauses his movements as Cloud presses the question. Eyes narrow slightly. This is the bridge they're going to have to cross. He has some knowledge from Aerith already, which makes him believe it is the same with Cloud, though until he crosses over he'll won't be sure.

Looks his game of eluding the subject is over.]

No, it is not something I don't remember, Cloud. It is something, for me, that never happened.

[And the bridge is crossed.]

[identitycrisiscore]

Never happened...?

[ Somewhere, it clicks for Cloud, suddenly. The Whispers. Sephiroth's involvement. It cuts through the panic coldly, a shred of reason piercing his distress. Sephiroth knew the future. Knew it so precisely that there was not real question of what he knew. But things that had happened to Cloud never happened from his perspective.

He remember what was said about the Whispers. They were there to keep life on its chosen course. Arbiters of fate. Why was Sephiroth so involved with the Whispers? Cloud has his suspicions. But he's smart enough not to voice them here, in front of Sephiroth. ]

[ The man can see Cloud start to get a grip on his panic. Wielding it like he wields any sword. A defiant glint in his gaze. Sephiroth admitting to it was easier than he expected. Maybe there was a trick to that, but... ]

So what you're saying is... just because it happened that way from your perspective... doesn't mean it'll happen for us.

[ He finds his tongue and he lashes out with Sephiroth. He can't deny the validity of what Sephiroth knows, but he can deny that just because he knows what happened for him, that it'll happen the same way for him... and for Aerith. ]

[sefirot]

I imagine the future can always be changed, if you're strong enough to defy fate -- to go against destiny.

[Which is neither a confirmation or a denial of what Cloud said. Things are already changing from what he's gathered. Why or the cause doesn't matter. Aerith spoke about the whispers and what they were trying to do.

Fate wants to stay the same, but the fact that some events are different means it can at least be bent. Sephiroth wants to find out more about this as it opens a lot of possibilities.]

But you need to know what will happen if you want to make sure you're on a different path.

[identitycrisiscore]

Is that so?

[ Cloud's eyes are narrowed, once again. Every conversation with Sephiroth felt like he had to measure out just what he was willing to say, what he wasn't. And oftentimes what he didn't want to say, Sephiroth already knew. It had put him on a decided backfoot in all their conversations before — and now was no exception. ]

And why do I suspect you're not just giving me this information out of the kindness of your heart?

[ But now felt a little more even. Now that he understood. Sephiroth was from a future... but not the future. Things had happened differently for them. That didn't make Sephiroth any less dangerous, but it did mean, in some ways, that Cloud didn't have to always play by the same tune. ]

...Why tell me all this?

[sefirot]

[Because he's curious about what Cloud will do with the information. He's also highly curious about a past that's being changed. He wants to know more and he knows he'll have to give some in order to gain in return.

He's fine sharing bits of information.]

Because it's what you want. This is the one guilt that will haunt your heart for the rest of your days. The one thing you'll never forgive yourself for. The one thing you'd do anything to change.

[He holds out his hand, but it's more symbolic than anything else.]

That's why I offer it. As a gift.

[identitycrisiscore]

[ Cloud doesn't take it. And Sephiroth wasn't expecting him to. His fists ball up, quietly. As he tries to stew on it. He's sure there's other reasons. But maybe the information is enough — to see him squirm. But Cloud is going to try and make the most of it. Try and figure out what he can do, knowing all this. He can't — won't — let Sephiroth win. ]

...Don't think this means anything between us has changed. I still don't trust you.

[ He grits his teeth. Sephiroth may be honest, but it doesn't mean he has to play to the man's tune. ]

Whatever it is you get out of this... I'll stop it, too. It and what happens to Aerith.

[ If nothing else, it keeps him driven, keeps him hungry, keeps him ready to continue the fight. ]

[sefirot]

I don't expect you to trust me, Cloud.

[They are bound by hatred between them. If Cloud didn't feel the same intense hatred ... well, then that might be a problem. But clearly not one he needs to worry about any time soon.]

But you also know that I'm not lying. And I know you'll try to be the hero you always wanted to be. One day maybe you'll get there.

[After he goes through more suffering. The two of them are the same in that too. Their pain makes them stronger.]