jigokulogs | JULY CATCH-ALL

Limited edition from a big designer from home. It's cool, isn't it?

(not that he truly was expecting an answer. he's attached enough that no opinions on it would shift his views of it, anyway. there was a time when shin would deeply relate to the hit of joy nicotine brings after a period of abstinence. it was always weird to think that gaia forbid their bands from smoking in a studio, when it would easily be a reason to not sign with them in the first place. too much about being a musician ends up being cliche, doesn't it? cigarettes, alcohol, whatever have you. he'd hide in the bathroom stalls between songs to get that sweet relief of cherry on his tongue.

all this to say - he understands the feeling.)

What he does in his free time is not a concern, but if it makes your life difficult and he does not take his work seriously, it still sucks either way.

(ah, the maturity of a sixteen year old, all we needed at ass-o'clock.)

Mhm? Yeah. I'm not going home so soon, so I thought I should eat a little.

[ Kim pauses in mid-drag, looking the lighter over. He looks as though he would like to say that it's a piece of junk, oversized and illogical, and certainly not reasonable to be lugging around his neck like a piece of scavenged shrapnel.

It is with some belligerence that he admits, ] Yes, it is pretty cool.

[ He wouldn't want one. Or maybe he would. But he'd never wear the damn thing. ]

Then come on and follow me. Considering your spirit of generosity, the least I can do is show you where they're all parked. There's a decent variety there; you're bound to find something that appeals to you. Just let me finish my cigarette. [ He looks cooly over at Shin, temper thoroughly assuaged by the nicotine hit. ] You're new here, right? What's your name?

(he could have annoyance painted on his face due to the expression on the other's, but honestly? it kind of just feels like what this man looks like, no offense. he too wouldn't really give in to the excitement of a teen over something trivial if he were that old and tired.

again, no offense.

but once he admits just how cool it is, shin beams, taking the lighter into his hands with the most care and appreciation.)

No problem, I'd rather finish mine too. Thank you for showing me around... I'm Shin. I've gotten here a few weeks ago.

Shin. [ Another Japanese name. Not a surprise, considering the kid's appearance, though like recognizes like; if you asked Kim to bet on it, he would bet that he's mixed. Suresne, perhaps, or whatever counts for it in their world. ]

It's nice to meet you, Shin. My name is Kim Kitsuragi. I've been here for a number of months now. About six now, I believe.

[ Half a year. It's enough to make him shudder. It's the furthest he's ever been from home, and the longest he's ever been away has been for nothing more than days at a time, just outside of the city.

He finishes sucking down his cigarette, then butts it out on the bottom of one heavy laced boot. ]

All right. Let's go. [ He gestures for Shin to follow him. ] And while we walk, you can tell me how settling into this place has been treating you. Let me guess... you're a part of Tamamo?

Six months? You must have seen it all.

(what's with people here giving their full names for free? gladly, kim hasn't asked him for it. a damper on the mood when he would say he wouldn't give it. shin's brain does try to pull the information - should he bow now? it's whatever, anyway, so he doesn't.

mimicking the other, he puts off the cigarette, hands on his pockets after he adjusts the guitar on his back. of course, he gives off tamamo vibes...)

Yep, Tamamo... It's not bad. I live with a friend, too, so money's not so bad, either.

More than I should like. Though not nearly as much as the people who were born and raised here.

[ Kim is, as always, keenly aware of his position as an outsider. What differentiates this from his homeland is that his position as an outsider here is something that he embraces; he never wants anyone to labour underneath the misconception that he somehow belongs here, or that this is anything like the place he's from. If anything, he would like to remind them that he belongs elsewhere, and no matter how much rank or economic gain or comfort he gains here, this will never be his home.

But it is not something he voices, let alone unloads onto some poor kid just trying to make his way in a new city, so he leaves it be. ] You came here with a friend, then? Or... have you already found someone that you wanted to live with?

[ He leads Shin through a couple of alleyways as a shortcut - he has some thoughts about the kid following a strange man through the city streets, but he keeps those to himself too - past the raucous bars and rowdy revelry, away from the shining neon lights and into a more quiet part of town, where a variety of food booths have been set up, complete with little stools for their customers to sit at. The scent of freshly cooked food fills the air; the rich tonkatsu broth of ramen, the sizzling oil as tempura is dumped inside, fresh soba noodles, grilled meats, simmering salty-sweet broth with fishballs merrily bobbing in the brine. ]

Here's where the food stalls generally park. [ He glances over at Shin. ] Good for getting some food into your gut before the night's revelries.

[ Translation: make sure you eat before you drink, you twig of a boy. ]

(surely, kim's right. they don't compare to the yokai in any shape or form, and considering they're all from different planes of existence, there's a possibility that even yokais would be lost here as well. he doesn't doubt there can be.

with a headshake, he just continues the conversation.)

I haven't come with anyone. She's someone I've met here already, and we decided to stick together. We disagree on many things, and she's very much not like me, but we make do.

(or he can read that as, she's not going to be seen drinking at this time, or doing half the things shin does. in fact, there's a part of shin that worries - he's just adding to haru's poor headache, but seen he's got nowhere to go, all he can do is be nice between those four walls.

ah, food... he hasn't eaten in days, so his stomach grumbles immediately after the aroma reaches him.)

... Yeah. I was planning to just sit somewhere and drink. This is a nice change of plans.

Food first. That's the rule.

[ Once Shin's chosen - Kim leaves it up to the kid; he's not so fussy that he needs to choose for himself, and he thinks he can get something no matter where they wind up - he hops up onto the stool beside him, resting his elbows lightly on the counter in front of them. The youkai behind the counter is industriously washing dishes and cups in preparation for her next customers and waves a dismissive hand at them, gesturing that she sees them and they can damn well wait until she's finished. Kim certainly doesn't mind. ]

Bold of you to live with someone so soon after meeting her. [ Maybe they're together. Shin's young and unruly. It's been known to happen. ] Is she in Tamamo as well?

Fine, dad.

(it's just so easy to go for the same thing as always, noodles as his choice for the evening. he knows he won't eat it all, but he can take it with him, and it will be a happy surprise later as he opens the refrigerator door the next day.

at the latter question, he snorts a little bit, head shaking a few times - come on, he knows what went through kim's mind. if he had heard of a co-ed roommate situation, he'd skip the 'maybe' and exchange it for 'for sure'.)

We're only friends, we don't even fuck, so it's not like it's complicated in any way. She's a good person, so I also would rather keep her closer just in case she gets into trouble.

(also skipping the other question.)

I would like to have it on the record that in no point in time was I asking for details about your sex life, and at no point in the future will I be asking for details about your sex life.

[ He's a kid! He doesn't want to hear about those things! Yes, yes, teens are sexually active, but Kim doesn't want to hear about it short of reminding them to use protection and to be safe about it. ]

Besides, that... sort of thing is arguably less risky than cohabitation is. [ It certainly is for Kim. He prefers to visit others' homes so that nobody knows where he lives or invades his private space, at which point he will likely never see them again. ] It's a commitment, that's all.

[ She - whoever this mystery girl is - is not in Tamamo. That narrows it down a bit. He sighs. ]

That said, it's a good idea to have people here you can trust to look out for you, and vice versa.

... Those are not details - do you think they're details?!

(puritan? much? that was a simple statement, and there's shock painted in his face. maybe he's just overly used to nana and his band, the level is low... or perhaps kim is older in spirit than he appears, and that is just as good a guess as the former.)

Do you think so? I think it's the opposite.

(expectations always arise from touch, a way or another, and this is more of a 'i'll help you until you're on your feet'.)

Yeah. She doesn't have a single mean body on her body, I worry in a place like this.

You've got to be about fifteen years old. I don't need to know about your sex life at all.

But yes, I think so. Cohabitation - and in some cases, friendship - can be a much more complicated matter. But there's no helping that.

[ He's probably revealing more about himself than he realizes. To Kim, it's simple fact, something he doesn't realize betrays more about his personal history than to how the world really works. Sex is very, very simple. Kim is good at not getting attached. ]

You may be right to worry. [ He glances at Shin, the piercings in his face, his sense of dress. He's interested in projecting a certain image, certainly. But whether or not it's genuine comes largely from his bearing, a sense that he's more experienced in certain things than a kid his age. He seems at home here, at least. ] This is a difficult city to live in. [ He catches the stallowner's attention, and he orders two bowls for them, watching as rich, steaming bowls of broth slowly fill up before their eyes. ]

... Kim. I'm eighteen. I just have one of those faces!

(bullshit, but alas.)

Edited 2022-09-10 03:18 (UTC)

I've hopped places with many different people. In my view, it's pretty simple.

(keep your head down, don't touch anything, be a bit of a ghost - and if it's nobu, let your hair down, but respect the other's space and privacy. it's what he could do, given the fact he would rather chew his own arm off than to live with his stepfather. ryoko's house is crowded, too many growing teens coming and going, and she's never home as is.

either way, he'll have to agree... and disagree. feels like the last place he dared to escape to, just a bit more fantastical. he could go into that, but the bowls now are set in front of them, and shin grimaces as the chopsticks are given with them.

fuck. yeah. no. he can't pick a single sushi with them, much less noodles. if he tries, it'll be an embarrassment. if he doesn't, it's just more information that can be used to take advantage of him later.

well, shit. he's going to have to try.)

If you're eighteen, I'm twenty-five.

[ Hey, two can play at that game, Shin. He doesn't believe the kid for a second. As someone who had a babyface well into his adulthood, he fancies himself pretty good at telling when someone is lying about their age, which Shin most certainly is -- and why not? It's not as though they carry around IDs here. He would have done the same at his age. Had done the same. He had managed to lie his way into a bar before, not realizing that his youth was quickly ending before he got a decent chance to live it. ]

But it's true that in many respects, this city is not unlike every other highly populated city. They all come with the same dangers. The yokai are new, though.

[ Like Shin, he frowns down at the chopsticks set in front of them. What this place has against forks, he'll never know. With a sigh, he picks them up with a hand that is decidedly inexpert, then glances over at Shin. ]

...You don't know how to use chopsticks?

[ He's surprised. He shouldn't be, the hypocrite, but he's become accustomed to being the odd man out. ]

With all the three thousand-year-olds that look like they're twenty, do you really think we're in a place that lets us debate on that?

(and that bothers shin to no end. he doesn't want to grow old, get wrinkly, get taller, lose the appearance that he has today - and yet, there are just so many people whose nature allows them to never age. it sparks a bit of green in the boy, and it shows in his frown.

and he was about to be defensive, say his hand is cramped from practice, when he notices the same struggle from a man who, much like shin, would easily look like he'd have no issues in it. he has to blink from watching the mirroed image of himself and his distaste in kim's own chopstick defeat.

no need to like to the black kettle, he decides.)

... No. I just look like this, you know... And you do, because you look exactly like me right now.

[ Kim is fully prepared to debate the matter - if Shin were one of those, he would have damn well said so, and besides, it doesn't stop him from treating Kamui like a fresh-faced twenty-five year old - but he's thoroughly distracted by some unexpected common ground. ]

I've gotten better with them, [ Kim says, more sheepish than he is defensive. He balances them between his fingers, not talking, just thinking. ] But it doesn't come naturally to me, no. Frankly, I wish everyone would just use forks and get on with it already.

[ But that's culturally insensitive. To himself. Which is very aggravating. ]

So... you're not one of the many here who were born and raised in Japan, I take it?

... I've been living in Japan for a few years now, but a lot just... Doesn't stick.

(language, customs, wardrobe, expectations, all things that shin sees, but they don't stick. instead of truly absorbing it, it's much more like he mirrors his surroundings, and poorly at that. it's hard to be something when you have been shamed for not being it enough and not taught it through his life.)

... I'm European. I'm... Still learning. You're European too, aren't you? I wasn't sure, but your accent...?

[ It's... an oddly vulnerable thing, talking about this. He hasn't spoken about it with anyone since his arrival. Not really. This doesn't count as talking about it either, per se, but it's more than he's done before; in a country where everyone who looks like him was born and raised in a society much like this one, what will they know of looking the part but not knowing any of it? Of knowing everything, but never looking the part? He had always craved some proximity to whiteness, clung to the half of his genetic makeup that was the same as everyone else's, thinking that he would far prefer being somewhere where everyone looked like him.

Now he's here, and all he wants is to go back. Desperately. Odd that he's met the one kid here who seems like he may know a thing or two about that. ]

Ah, yes. Europe does not exist where I'm from. I'm from a city called Revachol -- but people here have told me that I have what they call a French accent, so I think it's as close an analogue as any. [ He pauses, unsure as to whether or not he ought to elaborate. Then he decides that it's okay to, just this once. ] I have Seolite heritage, which is why I look like... [ He gestures at his own face, his sloping Suresne nose the only clue that he's anything but. ] But I'm a Revacholiere, through and through. I know none of the culture. None of the language. I certainly wasn't ever taught how to use these.

[ He gestures with the chopsticks, held clumsily in his right hand. ]

It's annoying, isn't it?

... C'est vrai. You do sound French to me.

(one wonder of being a swede is the intake of languages. the average one speaks three, four, and shin's no exception, albeit his language skills all go to swedish, english and japanese - everything else is poor conversational he's learned in school, which feels like such a lost past at this point.

but he gets kim like no one else could, as of the people he knows. while the other speaks, shin's eyes fall to the chopsticks that just feel wrong in his hands.)

... It is. I know how you feel, even if my experience is a little different.

(here are things he hasn't spoken about as openly before. a deep breath, and it goes.)

My mother killed herself after I was born in Sweden, and I don't know who my father is. I used to live with my stepfather and my stepbrother, but they aren't very fond of me, because of that situation. They're all Japanese, but because they barely spoke to me, they taught me practically nothing, so when I ran away to Japan, I didn't even know how to read it. It's complicated, and if you show you don't know something, you can get advantage taken of you, so I try my best to fit in... It's very difficult, though.

JULY CATCH-ALL

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cw suicide and parental neglect.