[SEMI-CLOSED] wretched and wild, all glory and trash.

[killtime]

⬤ Permissions Post ⬤
⬤ Open TDM Thread ⬤

Who ⬤ Andromache of Enma & likely questionable company!
What ⬤ Bastard woman desperately seeks naps and other thrilling tales
When ⬤ Catch-all for late June, after the events at Kaigo no Bou, and throughout July
Where ⬤ Andy's apartment (derogatory), various other locations in Jigoku-cho
Content Warnings ⬤ Profanity, violence, substance use, sex, etc. To be updated as needed!


PM or whaler#7695 if you'd like a starter!
Existing CR is welcome to drop wildcards.

Comments

[medicative]

[she stands, pausing to grab a tissue and dab at her eyes along with her bag. what she would do for some illusions right now, so no one can see the evidence of her tears. instead, she can just wipe away tears, the mascara that's smeared, trying for a semblance of dignity.

what is she going to say, when they pass out there to leave? what will she do, terrified that someone will see this lapse in herself? she doesn't know, but she reaches back for Andy.

tell me what to do.

if the front desk is smart, they will never mention it in their lives. if Emily has to be guided out, half hiding her face, no one should say anything.]

[killtime]

[ Breaks her heart a little, seeing Emily try to compose herself like that. Andy knows it's because it matters to her — to be strong where people can see her. To hide the fact that she's struggling. It must have taken a lot for her to show even this much vulnerability to someone else. Especially someone like Andy, who only met her two months ago — still a mystery, despite all the ways that they've become close. ]

Wait here a minute.

[ It feels a bit strange to pull away now, to separate from Emily after everything that's happened — but it'll only be a moment that she's gone, slipping out the door for a few minutes before she's back again, gesturing from the doorway for Emily to follow her. Outside, the hall and reception area are temporarily empty — who knows what Andy said to the volunteers, or what silly errand she invented for them, but for the moment, the coast is clear. She can guide Emily out, her hand on the other woman's opposite shoulder, keeping her close and shielded as they leave the clinic behind for the day.

If Emily wants to talk on the walk to her apartment, then Andy's willing to talk — but she's content all the same to walk in silence. It's all details, and nothing so important as getting Emily home. ]

[medicative]

[heaven knows what Andy said to them to get them to leave. heaven knows how agonized she feels over having to leave before she's supposed to, a desertion of duty. but if she stays, she'll collapse - this is fact, and she has to avoid it. she sticks close, as if using Andy for protection, not saying anything, just being near and keeping her face away from others. no one notices her when she shrinks into herself. unobtrusive, exactly as she wants it.

it's only when they're before her door, and she has to unlock it, that she speaks again.]

I'm so sorry to put this on you.

[let her apologize. let her walk in, put her bag up, do all the necessary things she has to do in order to feel in control. which really amounts to her sinking to her floor in what the general room is, on the floor pillows and with her head propped up on her elbows. honestly, she's scared to admit how tired she is. if she sleeps - if Andy stays, like this, there's no way she's not going to have nightmares.]

[killtime]

[ Andy lets Emily say and do what she needs to. Under different circumstances, maybe she'd argue against the apology — it's not as if she didn't choose this. She could've walked away any number of times. Their ugly fight would have been enough of an excuse. But instead, here she is, back in Emily's apartment again. She toes her boots off at the door, shrugging her jacket off and hanging it up before coming to join the other woman on the floor.

For a moment or two, she just lets the space and the quiet exist between them. Then, finally, she sinks down on the pillows too, feeling her own tiredness creep up on her. She lays at Emily's back, shifting just a little so that her forehead just barely presses between Emily's shoulder blades.

Finally, quietly: ]

Let me hold you?

[medicative]

...Yes.

[and the moment she does, Andy will feel Emily not so much relax into her as collapse, like taut strings were cut. she wants to cry again, out of stress and shame, gnawing at the edges of her being, that say she's asking too much of Andy. who's checked in on her? after whatever horrors that tower held? who's looking to Andy now?

it's easier to think about this than her own wretched state, to admit she's gone too far, that the precipice she's on is crumbling beneath her. it's too galling to say more, but for now....she does want to be held.]

[killtime]

[ It's easier than it really should be, wrapping her arms around Emily's middle and tugging her just a little closer. Andy's always been a sentimental creature — she was made for holding someone else, for fitting another person's body against her own. She folds Emily in to her chest, her heart steady and strong underneath her ribs, beating in the same rhythm that it has for thousands of years. Maybe there's something reassuring about that. She's solid and warm. The tide of her breath is just barely tangible against the nape of Emily's neck, her nose nudging gently at the fine baby hairs there.

Finally, low and quiet: ]

It'll be alright. I've got you.