jigokulogs | (CLOSED) — JUNE EVENT LOG

[ Logically bathing, wiping away all the day's grime and dirt is the better option but weariness cannot be reasoned with. The floor continues to beckon and tempt him to drop right there. But he perseveres against exhaustion as he has done through his time in the crimson rain. Wordlessly he nods in agreement to both offers, choices are limited anyway, and there is no need to cause unnecessary concern. He is fine, just as well as the boy before him.

The beckon has him straighten up as he realizes he has been caving into himself, just as swiftly he uncrosses his arms and it is then that his hand is taken before he has the chance to see himself to the bathroom. It's only then he notes Chongyun's gentle smile cast towards him and slowly he shifts his expression to offer a bright smile of his own. It's an expression still marked by weariness.

But everything would be just fine. They are together now.

Soon he is guided into the bathroom, then the shower and it is here that he is unable to hide his surprise. He hadn't expected to be led all the way here as the assumption had been that they would be taking turns bathing. That's not the case and Chongyun's question affirms this.

Does he stay the way he is? They're not going to undress? Certainly not but... ]

How are we... okay.

[ It would be more proper to let Xingqiu shower by himself, but Chongyun isn't confident that his friend won't collapse if left alone. It's fine; blood swirls down the drain, draining off their skin and clothes under the spray. Fabric soaks and clings to their bodies, no different than the day they'd been caught in that deluge after the movie.

The exorcist pours shampoo into his palm and scrubs Xingqiu's hair, taking care to work out the crusted blood that's caked in normally silky strands. Warm water continues to wash suds away, and he works until it all runs clean of red and bubbles. The thrum of warm droplets is therapeutic, easing the ache between his own muscles, offering a second-wind of energy to last him until they finally crash in his bedroom.

Sighing, Chongyun leans into the spray too, feeling the weight of the day washing off with the rest. The exhaustion doesn't quite go—too advanced—but it hurts less. ]

I'll hang our clothes up to dry after.

[ The extent of his own exhaustion is not what he considers as he finds himself sharing a shower with Chongyun. They may be clothed but this feels entirely too intimate for him to ignore as just a moment between his friend no matter how close they may be. No, he hasn't forgotten their shared kiss under the rain but after that, they never defined anything between them.

They may just as well have remained friends and nothing more. But what is he supposed to think now? He never planned this far ahead, he never expected they would have any sort of romantic encounter this soon. Perhaps they never should have kissed.

Or maybe he is exhausting himself further by letting his thoughts run rampant. He really needs to give his mind a break.

Closing his eyes with a sigh, he decides to enjoy the moment and let himself concentrate on the sensation of fingers combing through his hair; gentle eagerness behind a touch to see him clean. He is on the verge of memory, but he no longer needs help being bathed. ]

No, I'll care for my own garments.

[ He takes a hold of Chongyun's hand, despite prior assent Xingqiu decides it best to finish showering himself. ]

Ah, alright.

[ Despite the urge to tend to Xingqiu, he knows his friend is perfectly capable of tending to himself. Chongyun bites his bottom lip for a moment before withdrawing, allowing the other boy to draw his hand away. Suds hit the tile between them, water running clear of the blood rain that had stained them earlier. Tepid water takes away grime. Looking at his drenched friend, Chongyun really can't help but to dwell on that other rainy day. Even more vividly.

Cheeks warming, he glances away and focuses instead on himself. Scrubbing his downy hair, he rakes across his scalp to make sure all of the blood is gone.

Once satisfied he's clean enough, he grasps for one of the terrycloth towels and steps out of the shower. With one glance back, he plods around his room and grabs a change of clothes for the both of them. T-shirts and sweats, nothing significant, and he changes out of his clothes and hangs them over a chair to dry. Outside, the blood rain continues to pound against the windowpane.

Bringing the clothes into the bathroom for Xingqiu, ]

Are you hungry?

[ Assisted by Chongyun, his hair is mostly free of blood. All that's left for him to do is to rinse away the suds which is what he does once his friend retracts his hands. It's a small space beneath the shower head but he manages not to bump into the exorcist. His back now to Chongyun, his gaze is resolutely fixed on the far wall. He slows his progress allowing the other boy to finish showering first. That was entirely intentional.

Sound alone is enough to know when Chongyun steps out from beneath the spray. Listening for his friend's light steps he can follow along forming a picture in his head without the need to turn around to keep track of the other boy. That is how he manages to figure out when he is completely on his own within the bathroom.

It's at that time that he shuts the water off, that he attempts to wring his hair and then remove his garments. The shirt for the contest goes first, then the top, and well there is no delaying the inevitable; the faster he is about this the better. Finally, he is completely nude and Xingqiu reaches for a towel. He presses the fabric against his face to begin drying himself then.

Hearing his friend return Xingqiu is quick to cover his front with the towel almost using it as a shield. ]

Chongyun...

[ Chongyun looks at Xingqiu with eyes as wide as dinner plates.

In the shower had been one thing. Wet clothes weren’t so bad, because they still covered mostly everything even while hinting at what was beneath. Right now? The stark image of Xingqiu without a stitch of clothing, delicately draping himself with a towel like a freshly scrubbed nubile maiden caught dressing is … is …

Blood trickles down the exorcist’s cupid’s bow, reaching all the way down to his chin before he realizes what’s happened.

Nosebleed. Nosebleed!!!

His face flushes red before he can cover it, quickly scrubbing the back of his hand beneath his nose and flinging the clothing right at Xingqiu. ]

S, s, s—sorry!!

[ A boy has never fled a bathroom so fast. The thonk from right outside the bathroom also suggests that said boy also hit his head on the wall while fleeing across to the bedroom, missing the bedroom doorway because his eyes are still screwed shut. ]

[ Despite Chongyun's best attempts to obscure his face it's impossible to hide the obvious from Xingqiu's clear, observant eyes. The effect is immediate. The trickle of blood left a trail of red all the way down to the exorcist's chin until a single droplet splattered on the tile floor. Xingqiu doesn't hesitate to take a step forward with the intention to stem the blood flow but the other boy is quick.

Clothes are aimlessly thrown in his general direction. Chongyun's rush to flee leaves Xingqiu getting whacked by a shirt across the face and he doesn't manage to catch the sweats as they flutter past hesitant hands. The towel is now at his feet along with the shirt, meanwhile, the sweats have landed in the shower. Great.

The loud thud from outside the bathroom reveals that things haven't improved for his friend. That sounded painful.

Picking up the shirt from the floor Xingqiu soon dons it and hopes it's enough to cover up. As for the sweats, one look is enough to tell him they're now wet. The sole reason to collect them is the same reason why he picks up his beach wear and that's to lay the garments out to dry. Trailing after Chongyun, he haphazardly hangs the clothes off the back of a chair. ]

You were asking me if I'm hungry. I am going to guess you want to eat?

[ Face against the wall, Chongyun wills his heart to stop beating so fast. Thankfully the wood is cool against his forehead, and when he turns back around he’d mostly calmed down. After all, they’re both boys, it’s not a big deal … which is what he tells himself despite the image printed on the back of his eyelids feeling so salacious.

When he sees Xingqiu in just the classic “boyfriend t-shirt” look, which includes no pants and the hem of Chongyun’s shirt just grazing the top of his pale thighs, the exorcist almost falls over dead. Flustered, he swallows, trying to pretend like he is not greatly affected by the image. Xingqiu has been kind enough to pretend like Chongyun didn’t just act like a huge buffoon, he can’t repay that by acting even more like a buffoon.

He’s careful to keep at least three feet of distance between them, if not more. Any closer would be too dangerous. ]

I’m not too hungry—but I’ll make something if you are.

[ Slowly, he pulls his shirt up to use it to wipe away the blood beneath his nose, revealing a stretch of taut muscle along his abdomen.

He sighs. Why is he so lame…? ]

[ From a rational perspective, Xingqiu is only showing a slightly higher percentage of skin but that is mostly due to the fact that he is wearing a short-sleeve shirt. As for the hem of Chongyun's top grazing his thighs, he doesn't give it much of a thought, it would have to suffice until he would get something to accompany the single article of clothing on his body.

It's impossible to miss Chongyun's flushed face just as it isn't difficult to connect the dots to the cause. A hand crosses over his midsection until it's at the hem of the shirt which he tries to pull lower to no avail. Not that he is entirely displeased seeing Chongyun's reaction.

Flustered, Chongyun looks adorable and he can't help but cast a fond upon the exorcist.

Distance may be Chongyun's ally, but it never crosses Xingqiu's mind. They've been close for many years. Besides, they've kissed before and now... Before he can take that initial step to close the space between them he speaks. ]

It can wait. In any case, I am also capable of putting something together.

[ His eyes never stray away from Chongyun's figure, he takes in that peek of a well-trained body. Not surprising but it does little to depreciate its allure. In the time that Chongyun is distracted wiping his nose, Xingqiu gets close and his delicate fingers brush against the strays strands of hair across his friend's forehead. ]

Does it hurt here?

[ Slender fingers brush across his forehead; Chongyun sighs again, this time a different kind of sigh, and closes his eyes while relishing that touch. ]

It doesn’t.

[ What’s been battered the most is whatever pride he has … but they’ve known each other for a long time. Xingqiu has seen him at his most embarrassing, and knocking into a wall doesn’t even rank in the top ten.

As impactful as the imagery of the boyfriend t-shirt is, Chongyun finally begins to relax. Exhaustion overcomes adrenaline—he finally drops into a chair, sliding his arms around Xingqiu’s waist and pressing his forehead lightly against his friend’s belly.

It’s comforting. His scent, his warmth, the sound of his voice. Closer is dangerous … but it also feels so good. ]

[ The inquiry serves a purpose. The audible sound of Chongyun hitting a wall had reached him while he was sequestered in the bathroom, that could not have been a painless crash. It's why his fingers linger a little longer across his friend's forehead, still brushing at stray locks. It's not much but he could at least heal small injuries even if it meant leaving Chongyun with a soaked fringe.

As for mending pride, well, he doesn't have a quick fix for that.

Unsurprisingly, exhaustion settles over Chongyun and it serves as a reminder of his own weariness but there would be no complaints from him. Xingqiu knows that if only for just a little longer he can be Chongyun's support tonight. It's why he remains enveloped in the exorcist's embrace, combing delicate fingers through soft blue locks. ]

Good, I am glad it doesn't.

Are you certain you don't want anything to eat? Or something to drink?

No ... I don't really have an appetite.

[ If Xingqiu were hungry he would have eaten for the sake of eating together, but he's hit the point of tired that there's no room for it. Exhaling, Chongyun rests for a moment linger, flat palms sliding down along the curve of his friend's back. They stop to sit over his tailbone, not risking another inch down.

Reluctantly, he finally lets go for the sake of getting up again. Xingqiu's residual warmth tingles at his fingertips. ]

How about we head to bed? I think we both could use some rest.

[ Though, he might end up staying awake just because he's reached the point of being wired. Exhausted, but buzzing. Regardless ... his body needs to rest, and the bed in the bedroom is big enough for the both of them to share. Getting comfortable is a step in the right direction. ]

[ He won't brush the subject again. There is no point in insisting although it would likely be healthier for both of them to get something to eat. He had only snacked on some cotton candy earlier in the day and that hardly equated to a balanced meal, yet he finds himself lacking an appetite much like his friend.

He remains still as Chongyun traces his figure, hands only stopping as they get close to turning this into something far from innocent.

As Chongyun gets to his feet, Xingqiu steps back allowing him enough room to stand. The suggestion is met with a nod. He fully agrees that they do need rest, they need to recover. The strange weariness lingers, although he still notes he doesn't feel as exhausted since finding shelter. ]

That sounds great. Really. I'm in need of sleep. No reading before bed for me.

[ Which is typical for him but tonight — besides, he isn't sure if Chongyun has any reading material aside from the books obtained in his research of the youkai found through the city. So with that decided he would follow Chongyun along to his room, although midway he does reach for the exorcist's hand with a coy smile. ]

Well, I guess I've been invited under the sheets with you.

[ To answer that, no: all of his books are in some way related to spirits and youkai. There are also much less in the way of books in his apartment in general; his bedroom is neat, scarcely decorated, and very minimalistic. Chongyun leads the way once their hands lock, flushing a little but otherwise keeping his head as he pulls the covers down to reveal clean white sheets. ]

Do you have to say it like that?

[ But there's nothing really chiding in his tone—just usual faint exasperation with that touch of fondness.

Chongyun tugs Xingqiu into the bed, giving his friend the better pillow before sliding down next to him. The sheets are cool and feel good against his freshly washed skin, the mattress soothing to the ache in his bones. Even when they're in bed, he doesn't try to detangle their hands. ]

Comfortable?

[ For Xingqiu that becomes obvious as they head towards Chongyun's room but he didn't expect otherwise; after all from what he recalls most of the text Chongyun speaks of involved research into spirits and his family's archives on the matter. While such research does spark interest, it's not the type of reading he would do before bed. Although he does consider that investing in a collection here may be pointless but so is taking any action...

Who knows what may come when they return home.

And despite his doubts, any forming worry, he can smile sweetly at Chongyun. ]

Like what? We're not going to be under the same sheets?

[ Not once does he think to let go of Chongyun, while he doesn't need reassurance or physical affirmation, he recognizes that this feels nice. Once in bed, he sighs out as cool sheets are pressed against exposed skin and he turns his head to the side to face Chongyun. ]

Plenty. Although I don't think it has as much to do with the bed as it does with your company.

[ Xingqiu is so good with words. Naturally—the young man is a wordsmith with a silver tongue, as handsome as he is clever. Chongyun's gaze lingers on the petal pink of his lips as he speaks, cheeks flushing at another arrowed tease. It goes right for his heart, landing bullseye as always. The sheets feel especially cool beneath his warm cheek; his eyes lid for a moment, distracted with an intrusive thought.

Although he's acknowledged his feelings for the other boy, Chongyun still tries to practice restraint. Even if he feels his condition has become more stable, it takes next to nothing for Xingqiu to get his blood heated.

Maybe it's because he's so tired from the day's events and because he had gotten overwhelmed twice in quick succession, but the exorcist lacks the restraint of a normal night. His reply to that sweet sentence is to lean forward and close the gap between them, warm lips lightly brushing over Xingqiu's. It's a chaste kiss, but not a short one. A kiss that lingers long enough for him to close his eyes and breathe in Xingqiu's scent and to squeeze his hand affectionately.

And when it ends, he doesn't go far. He's basically sharing Xingqiu's pillow when he opens his eyes again to meet their gazes. ]

Mn.

[ A soft noise of agreement. The bed has nothing to do with it at all. ]

[ Contact brings sweeping warmth through him that he knows isn't caused by the sheets around him. Finally, it seems like it settles but his face doesn't quite cool. It's prolonged exposure, although there is no immediate realization, Xingqiu is finding himself comfortable in his own embarrassment. A flushed face along with a smile is what Chongyun will get for his effort, light laughter follows as Xingqiu presses pretty pink lips against the exorcist's nose.

Proximity doesn't immediately equate to intimacy, for many years their close bond had them side by side. Throughout their excursions out to Qingce Village and other far-off places. A moment of solitude didn't always have to mean being alone, not when there was someone he could share adventures and perform heroic deeds with. There is someone he wants at his side for the rest of his life.

And while not all wishes can be granted, for now, here in the depths of a place called hell Chongyun's bed is paradise.

There is no hesitation, he touches Chongyun as he always wanted. It's a light touch of his nose, index finger right where his lips had been just seconds ago; running over the bridge and then across the exorcist's forehead tousling messy bangs before he caresses the boy's cheek. It's only then that he delivers his own kiss, not as long as Chongyun's but sweet enough to convey a single emotion that he is beginning to better comprehend.

It's becoming clearer, more obvious, although how long his heart nurture such feelings remains a mystery. He loves Chongyun of course, it's obvious now, but maybe he was too foolish or prideful to be straightforward. Rejection certainly would have made things awkward...

But right now, for this moment, he will only focus on what there is ahead for them together. ]

Well, I guess it's no secret that I cherish every moment spent with you.

Even when we're in disagreement.

[ He likes it when Xingqiu touches him.

It isn't as though he didn't before, of course ... but there's a difference in the way the boy touches him now. Smooth fingers brush along the bridge of his nose and forehead, play with his hair, cup against his cheek. Intimate gestures that he no longer sees as platonic since their relationship moved into a gray area where romance bleeds with inexperience and uncertainty.

Warmth tickles Chongyun's cheeks. The taste of Xingqiu's kiss lingers on his tongue, a phantom brush of sensation across his lips. It makes him want more—which is why he reaches out to caress Xingqiu's cheek in turn, thumb a affectionate brush before that hand slides to the back of the boy's head. Fingers comb through his hair before Chongyun guides his head forward, leading Xingqiu to rest his head against his chest.

Once he's pressed Xingqiu's temple to his chest, Chongyun rests his arm in the small of the boy's waist. A possessive little curl to keeping him close. ]

I feel the same. [ eyelids lowering again, he presses a kiss to Xingqiu's forehead. ] Xingqiu ... I want to stay with you. No matter what.

[ It's a quiet, honest admission. Whether or not that's something they can do, assuming they can get out of this Hell and get back to Liyue, Chongyun doesn't know. They both have their obligations. Roles they're meant to play. The future is unclear, and no one can know what will happen. Even so, that's his selfish hope. That they can stay together. ]

[ An explicitly expressed wish, one that Xingqiu himself shares, reaches his ears; not solely in desire but he is also well aware of the uncertainty the future would bring. Whether they remain long in hell, inevitably they will return, that is their goal isn't it? Once in Liyue, when they again follow the rhythm of their homeland, then he isn't sure how much obligation will result in the bending of promises. His own desires, his own needs, would have to come second.

Yes, there is a role they both are meant to play. Rather than temper passions alone, he is someone else, he casts an image for the public to see. He is beloved, the studious and polite Xingqiu; someone that parents within Liyue Harbor only secretly harbor hopes their children would be like.

A breath follows, deep, and long. Just enough that despite only just having come from the shower and dressed in fresh clothes he can pick up the underlying scent of his friend. With that he brushes his cheek against Chongyun's chest, comfort sought until he settles.

That beat.

He is quick to follow the tempo of the exorcist's heartbeat with a tap of his fingers.

There is a question at the tip of his tongue, one he never does voice tonight but rather keeps to himself with no plans of ever divulging. No matter what. It's not vague, yet was it truly unconditional? What if he were to die? What if only metaphorically? If Zhenyu never penned another work? If the disciple spoken of within the story Ring of Raining Blades never picked up his sword again?

Actually, he wouldn't like that person very much himself.

Well, carefree days can't last forever. ] I'll do what I can to make that wish come true.

(CLOSED) — JUNE EVENT LOG | JULY CATCHALL

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