semi-closed 🔪 sometimes it's better to lose than compromise

[pitfight]

Who ⬤ Nishitani and various
What ⬤ It's trauma time! (event nsfw)
When ⬤ THE BLOOD RAIN BABY
Where ⬤ various
Content Warnings ⬤ TRAUMA!! BLOOD!! GORE!! VIOLENCE!! PTSD!! SEX!! BODY HORROR? This is a nsfw post for event stuff, so be warned

if you would like to tag into this/want a starter, hmu at bussy!

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[pitfight]

Hey, fucking stop that. [ Nishitani doesn't want Childe to bite off his own tongue just because of a skip in his speech. ] I'm not taking any chances with this fucking cursed rain, so show where you're hurt.

[narbrawl]

[A hint of petulance comes over his face at the scolding and it doesn't look quite right on him; spirited as he is, Childe is a military man and discipline was beaten into him from the moment he became a Fatuus. From before that, really, and the thought of his oldest teacher and her stern eyes- he'd been searching for her too without even realising it, hadn't he?- makes his stomach twist.

So, he forces himself to focus, sucking on his sore tongue and staring hard at Nishitani until the blurred lines of his features settle into a more solid shape.]

... I'm not- it's nothing. [Nothing to a Harbinger, at least.] I'm just tired.

[Saying it aloud breaks the spell. With a soft huff, Childe drops forward and crumples against Nishitani, forehead pressed to his shoulder and eyes squeezed shut.]

[pitfight]

We're all tired, kid. [ But Nishitani doesn't push Childe away. Instead he just brings a hand up to pat the kid's head, to rest in a loose one armed hug at the end. What Nishitani said is true: everyone's tired. Nishitani is tired-- Nishitani doesn't get tired, but he's fucking beat from all the shit this cursed garbage is raining down. He's been on his feet since the beach, either with Andy or Toraguma, he wants to lay down, he wants a fucking bath, but all that gets to wait. Childe is tired, they're all tired. Nishitani knows this is a safe place to rest because he made it one-- so lucky for Childe, his rest should come soon. ]

[narbrawl]

[For a few moments, he stays like that, silent but for the uneven shudder of his breathing as he tries to calm down. Only the warmth of Nishitani's body keeps him from slipping back into his half-dreams and the Abyss lurking within them, ties him to present. The veins in his eyelids throb; his lungs ache. He breathes.

In, out.

Reluctantly, he draws back and opens his eyes, though he doesn't raise them just yet. Instead, he reaches up and takes hold of Nishitani's lapel. He still doesn't feel quite real and, almost out of nowhere, he's hit by a sudden need to hear his own name.]

Ajax. Just- just for now, call me Ajax.

[pitfight]

Ajax? [ Nishitani taps out a ciggarette while Childe composes himself, letting the kid do so with moderate privacy, Nishitani's eyes aimed elsewhere. When he lights up and pulls back, with the smoke that leaves his lips: ]

Miles fucking better than Chi-chan, kid.

[narbrawl]

[Slowly, the world comes into focus. His sneakers are dark with blood, the frayed bottoms of his pants dyed red where it's soaked into the fabric. Opposite, Nishitani's loafers. He lifts his chin, letting his gaze wander up over the lines of his legs, past his belt and tie and finally to his face. There's still a slightly distant look to Childe's eyes but he's at least making an effort to stay conscious.

A moment of weakness is acceptable- but nothing more.

At once, any doors that might have been opened into his mind are slammed shut once more. It's a physical transformation as much as a mental one; he brute forces his body into its typical casual stance and his expression back into indiscernibility. The smile he gives him is strained but secure, like a tightly laced mask.]

Miles better than "kid", old man. [He turns away, heading over to the water cooler in the corner.] You look even worse than when I saw you at the clinic.

[Instead of drinking, he cups a hand beneath the spout, pours himself some cold water directly into it and splashes it over his face.]

[pitfight]

[ Nishitani notes each change, the way Childe's shoulders go back, the confidence that straightens his spine. There's no noise, Nishitani not mentioning Childe cleaning off but instead going over and offering him a napkin once he's finished. ] There's a shower, you know.

[narbrawl]

[As inviting as a hot shower sounds right about now, he's far more put off by the thought of making himself vulnerable long enough to even take one. Instead, he takes the napkin and scrubs at his face- a little harder than is really necessary, it has to be said.]

I'll pass, thanks.

[What he does do is peel off his jacket and toss it across the back of a chair. His shirt follows and, without explanation, he heads towards the tiny excuse for a kitchenette at the back and puts his entire head under the tap. It's ice cold but he doesn't stop until the water through his hair runs clear. A collection of fresh wounds -some have already been sewn up- are on full display, along with a few patches of peeling skin along his shoulders.]