Yeah? Me too. We don't have to get along all the time and actually it's better if we don't, it's just better havin' somebody around. I'm from a big family though, so maybe that's why.
[ ryouma know that's not why and there's an awkward few seconds as it dawns on him because he's bracing for something. ]
Huh. And 'cause of Oryou, of course. I keep expectin' it t' feel like it did before whenever I talked about 'er...
[ the last time he'd tried talking about her it had been more than just an emotional loss because it was painful on some magical or spiritual level he couldn't even properly describe, let alone heal. his hand goes unconsciously to the second sword he still has tucked into his hakama strings. it has everything to do with that, after all, and is really screwing with his existential bullshit lately. ]
Ah—... sorry. It probably doesn't seem like much, but the boss gave me somethin' recently that's changed just about everything.
[ which, he also realises, could be somewhat alarming given the stakes these days. ]
Not in a bad way! It's—...
[ he pauses, thinks to find the words. ]
It's like ya go all your life seein' things like ya do and then someone gives ya a pair of glasses. Ya saw trees all your life but now ya see the details clearly. If that makes sense..? I'm sorta workin' through some of it as I go along. I still miss her though...
[ just a normal amount. ryouma is just too proud perhaps to admit that it had been very bad. contributing factor to his ending up cursed and his shooting of izō problems, bad. he's just going to shut up and drink. ]
no subject
[ ryouma know that's not why and there's an awkward few seconds as it dawns on him because he's bracing for something. ]
Huh. And 'cause of Oryou, of course. I keep expectin' it t' feel like it did before whenever I talked about 'er...
[ the last time he'd tried talking about her it had been more than just an emotional loss because it was painful on some magical or spiritual level he couldn't even properly describe, let alone heal. his hand goes unconsciously to the second sword he still has tucked into his hakama strings. it has everything to do with that, after all, and is really screwing with his existential bullshit lately. ]
Ah—... sorry. It probably doesn't seem like much, but the boss gave me somethin' recently that's changed just about everything.
[ which, he also realises, could be somewhat alarming given the stakes these days. ]
Not in a bad way! It's—...
[ he pauses, thinks to find the words. ]
It's like ya go all your life seein' things like ya do and then someone gives ya a pair of glasses. Ya saw trees all your life but now ya see the details clearly. If that makes sense..? I'm sorta workin' through some of it as I go along. I still miss her though...
[ just a normal amount. ryouma is just too proud perhaps to admit that it had been very bad. contributing factor to his ending up cursed and his shooting of izō problems, bad. he's just going to shut up and drink. ]