[she's too close, and she doesn't have the mercy of turning and hiding her face. there's nowhere she can deflect and get away, and she feels it as a peculiar sort of agony. wanting to scream, and smothering it behind her lungs. do something, anything, before the hairline cracks in her amount to something, before she can't stem the bleeding.]
...I...
[so soft. weak. pathetic, just disgustingly so. a coward who can't even finish the job before her, since she already let something out.]
...I don't know what I want.
[it's as if Andy cracked open her chest and fit her hand around her heart, fluttering and fragile. there are so many ways to crush it. to leave her defeated, broken, with new scars. go on, hate her, for being a pitiful thing.
but it's true. she doesn't know. she doesn't even know if she's allowed to want something right now. she doesn't know, and a hint to all of this inner torment is probably in her face, her eyes. Andy has her exposed, and can be satisfied knowing that she's right about it all. this cannot be sustained.]
no subject
...I...
[so soft. weak. pathetic, just disgustingly so. a coward who can't even finish the job before her, since she already let something out.]
...I don't know what I want.
[it's as if Andy cracked open her chest and fit her hand around her heart, fluttering and fragile. there are so many ways to crush it. to leave her defeated, broken, with new scars. go on, hate her, for being a pitiful thing.
but it's true. she doesn't know. she doesn't even know if she's allowed to want something right now. she doesn't know, and a hint to all of this inner torment is probably in her face, her eyes. Andy has her exposed, and can be satisfied knowing that she's right about it all. this cannot be sustained.]