[it's strange. of course it's strange. Hazel had found it that way herself when she'd first realized the extent of what had been done to her, what it meant. the reality she could now perceive was still one with no place in it for her; in the end it was just another proof of her wrongness.
her shoulders hike slightly when she reads the surprise in Aerith's expression, ready to go on the defensive as soon as the comment should land. but nothing comes...and there's something strange in the shifting tides of the woman's gaze. a connection feels too presumptuous of her to assume, not with something like herself, but there's...something that lingers for just a moment. it's enough to put her posture back into neutral.]
...I don't really know.
[it's easier to be honest when addressing someone's back, and she suspects that this is intentional on Aerith's part. it ought to rankle her a little, but the fact of the matter is that 'do you want what you've lost returned?' has been a question she's been purposefully avoiding no matter how much pressure it's been building up within her. venting a little of that metaphorical steam can't be the worst thing in the world.]
I never fucking asked for it to begin with. Things that hide themselves like that want to stay hidden, it's not like anyone was fucking thrilled I could tell what was actually happening. It just made more problems for me.
[and yet...she frowns, the knot in her stomach tightening.]
Who else is gonna do anything, though? Nobody ever seems to fucking care.
[she'd helped people who'd have vanished without a trace because of what she could see, what she could do. they'd grown afraid of her as well by the end, but they'd still been alive to reach that conclusion. how could she turn her back on that when she knew for a fact no one else in her world with that sight gave a shit about blind humans?]
no subject
her shoulders hike slightly when she reads the surprise in Aerith's expression, ready to go on the defensive as soon as the comment should land. but nothing comes...and there's something strange in the shifting tides of the woman's gaze. a connection feels too presumptuous of her to assume, not with something like herself, but there's...something that lingers for just a moment. it's enough to put her posture back into neutral.]
...I don't really know.
[it's easier to be honest when addressing someone's back, and she suspects that this is intentional on Aerith's part. it ought to rankle her a little, but the fact of the matter is that 'do you want what you've lost returned?' has been a question she's been purposefully avoiding no matter how much pressure it's been building up within her. venting a little of that metaphorical steam can't be the worst thing in the world.]
I never fucking asked for it to begin with. Things that hide themselves like that want to stay hidden, it's not like anyone was fucking thrilled I could tell what was actually happening. It just made more problems for me.
[and yet...she frowns, the knot in her stomach tightening.]
Who else is gonna do anything, though? Nobody ever seems to fucking care.
[she'd helped people who'd have vanished without a trace because of what she could see, what she could do. they'd grown afraid of her as well by the end, but they'd still been alive to reach that conclusion. how could she turn her back on that when she knew for a fact no one else in her world with that sight gave a shit about blind humans?]